The Fortniteporn parody just dropped like the supply llama you desperately needed.
Giving a new meaning to "bush bros," Fortnutfeatures everything you expect from a porn version of a gaming phenomenon. There's shitty CGI (are they dropping in on upside-down walkers instead of parachutes?), awkward acting, nutsack humor, a dildo gun, and nerd-favorite porn star April O'Neil.
But it's also somuch more than something to bust a nut to.
SEE ALSO:This sex-positive indie game is basically Nintendo meets pornWritten by O'Neil herself, Fortnutoffers poignant digs into the gaming culture that sprung from the loins of this battle royale favorite. H1Z1and PUBGare referenced as the OGs of the genre. There's a naked version of the Jubilation dance emote. Free-to-play monetization models are skewered.
But best of all, there are subtle jabs at the dick-joke-loving gamer dudes who troll women in games. The whole porn is framed through a streamer named PussySparkles (played by Missy Martinez), a clear play on the so-called Boob Streamers that dudes on Twitch love to get mad at for being "fake gamer girls." She's joined by such comedic geniuses as boner_jammz69, vagninja, urM0msuxxx.
Playing as Ramirez -- the only woman on the team -- O'Neil also has her competence immediately questioned by Testiclehead (the porn version of Fornite's Tomatohead) for playing with a default skin rather than spending money on an outfit for the lolz.
But in the end it's O'Neil who gets the last laugh, as the one who ultimately wins the royale.
April O'Neil literally kills it as the star and writer of 'Fornut'Credit: woodrocket and pornhubTrue to life, the two yokels who spent money on expensive skins get eliminated first. And O'Neil delivers a burn to all Forniteplayers who, like Testiclehead and Bone Trooper, buy virtual bullshit to seem cooler than the #noobs.
"I guess the money you spent on skins should have been spent on not dying in the first few minutes of the game, dick,” she taunts after Testiclehead gets taken out.
The only thing that could've made Fornuta more perfect encapsulation of eye-rolling gamer culture was if it included a chatbox of trolls screaming at O'Neil for ruining games. But porn is a place for fantasies, after all.
H/T Motherboard
TopicsFortniteGamingPorn
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